24 Character Countdown (Episode 11)
Well, this week was sort of a slow week for 24, because Jack didn’t really do anything this episode. I’m instituting a new rule here at the Character Countdown. Any time anyone uses the phrase “it’s complicated” to describe something that’s happening or has happened it’s an automatic -5. Jack is the worst person at doing this and it’s really starting to bug me.
Tom Lennox (14) 
-Was against Reed’s plan from the beginning and had the cajones to admit it (+5)
-Tried turning something with his feet, but didn’t successfully do anything helpful at all (-3)
Net Gain/Loss: +2
Current Total: 16
President Wayne Palmer (40)
-Threatened military action against the Ambassador’s country (+5)
-Did so in his most threatening whisper. He was using his “inside voice,� shh (-6)
-Whispered sternly to Logan that he’s a criminal (+7)
-Threatened to hunt down Logan if he tries to escape (+5)
-Granted Logan’s release even though Logan was the one that killed his brother (+8)
-Got blown up (-10)
Net Gain/Loss: +9
Current Total: 49
Bill Buchanan (121)
-Threatened to hand over Morris’ duties to Chloe (+4)
-Was so moved by Morris’ rousing speech of duty that he didn’t do it (-5)
Net Gain/Loss: -1
Current Total: 120
Nadia Yassir (108)
-Followed Bill some more (-3)
-Even finished one of his sentences (-3)
-Wait, did everyone see that? Rewind your Tivos and VCRs you’ll want to check that out again. Yep, she did, she disagreed with Bill. Nadia has a backbone! (+10)
Net Gain/Loss: +4
Current Total: 112
Jack Bauer (361)
-Used the phrase “it’s complicated,� (-5)
-Called for a perimeter to catch is father. But, what he has failed to learn is that CTU perimeters couldn’t catch a cold (-5)
-Took over the recapping duties from Bill this episode. That’s Bill’s job Jack, how about you go kill some people (-3)
-Still has time to get a little touchy feely with Marilyn, Bow-chica-wow-wow (+7)
-Confronted the man that was the reason he was in a Chinese prison camp (+5)
-Told Logan that he didn’t trust him (+6)
-Looked nice in his new suit (+2)
-Wasn’t in this episode nearly enough (-7)
Net Gain/Loss: 0
Current Total: 361
Chloe O’Brian (151)
-Asked Morris to call his AA sponsor, she’s so caring (+4)
-Spent the entire episode covering for Morris (-3)
-Kicked in Morris’ bathroom stall (+5)
-Told a guy to get out of the bathroom, I would’ve been scared if I were that guy. Chloe’s scowl could probably turn you to stone if you stared long enough (+6)
Net Gain/Loss: +12
Current Total: 163
Morris O’Brian (62)
-Didn’t uplink his vectors because of a bad SIP adaptor, DUH! (-5)
-Gave a great speech on how he can do his work even though less than a few hours ago he was power drilled in the arm. Look Morris as long as you don’t forget your vectors and sectors it’s ok (+6)
-Ah crap! Along with bad SIP adaptors, his function prototypes were off too (-7)
-Is probably the first character in 24 history to actually go to the bathroom (+10)
-Put the blame on Chloe, by calling her obsessed (-5)
-Dumped out his alcohol (+6)
Net Gain/Loss: +5
Current Total: 67
Sandra Palmer: (18)
-Didn’t appear in this episode (+10)
-Is sure to appear in future episodes because now Wayne is all blown up and she will for sure be sitting next to his bed in the hospital (-15)
Net Gain/Loss: -5
Current Total: 13
LEADERBOARD:
Jack Bauer—361
Chloe O’Brian—163
Bill Buchanan—120
Nadia Yassir—112
Karen Hayes—108
Milo—105
Morris O’Brian—67
President Wayne Palmer—49
Tom Lennox—16
Sandra Palmer—13
Worst Terrorist Haircut Award: Goes to Gredenko. Man that guy’s hair just looks awful. Worse than Phillip Bauer’s haircut.
Worst Security Award: Goes to the Secret Service. After checking the bomber’s briefcase thoroughly (and by thorough I mean that if the highlighters highlight and the tape recorder records then everything must be safe) they decided it ok to let the guy through.
Leaky Bomb Making Award: Goes to the henchman that built the bomb that blew up President Wayne and Assad. Those speaker holes can be horrible when dealing with liquid explosives.
Broke Even Award: Goes to Jack. Sometimes Jack isn’t the amazingly awesome man we all think he is. Sometimes he just doesn’t do anything, which was the case this episode.
As always please add your awards and they’ll be added to the Countdown.
February 27th, 2007 at 1:37 pm
Ummm, that’s 2 straight weeks of not mentioning Charles Logan. The man has a beard, wears some sort of cowboy outfit, is reciting bible scriptures, and says he wants to make up for his past. What else does he have to do? If he’s not here next week, I’m out.
February 27th, 2007 at 2:16 pm
Yeah? Where’s Logan’s count? +5 for creepy beard. -5 for doofy cowboy outfit. -5 for reciting scriptures and talking to himself.
And Morris wasn’t actually using the restroom, he was drinking, so does that really count? (that was awesome of Chloe!)
February 27th, 2007 at 2:25 pm
Heroic speech added at the last minute to stop fan debate: Tom Lennox’s “I was against you from the start” speech. The exact question most fans asked after last week gets an answer screamed in our face. So much for subtlety.
February 27th, 2007 at 3:12 pm
Redemption award should go to Assad for saving the President’s life. How’s that for an example of redemption and forgiveness, Mr. Logan? Here you are, slowly going about getting information for whatever messed-up plans you’ve got (I think he might want to go after Aaron and Martha?) while an ex-terrorist is detecting bombs and diving to cover the leader of the free world he hates. That’s what I call heroic.
February 27th, 2007 at 3:34 pm
I sure hope Morris had finished wiping. (+10 if he didn’t. That takes guts to just pull up the pants to save your ego)
-8 to Jack for wearing one of Logan’s suits. I can’t think of anywhere else he could’ve got it. Now Jack is going to be all logany.
And Other Aaron, I seriously cracked up when I read “doofy cowboy outfit”!! Nice one! hahaha
February 27th, 2007 at 8:20 pm
Does anyone know what Nadia’s job actually is? I am really starting to wonder what she’s doing there. I’m giving myself a -10 everyday until I find out…
February 27th, 2007 at 9:32 pm
I agree charles logan needs to get on boared the “charecter countdown”, and I would like to add a couple of special awards…
most complicated love life ever goes to jack bower… first wife, audrie, now this.
worst stalking scene goes to chloe for following morris into the urinal
February 27th, 2007 at 9:37 pm
Yep, have to agree with Chuck and Other Aaron that we need Logan in the countdown - so that we can can watch him take a huge dive when we find out what his REAL motivations are. How low-gan he go? Sorry.
February 28th, 2007 at 12:26 am
i think it was pretty dumb how they made it seem that Assad took about 1 min to look at the bomb. I suppose I would take awhile to look at it too. but it did seem pretty long.
February 28th, 2007 at 5:33 am
the_bird: nadia is there for eye candy purposes only. that’s part of the CTU tradition of slap-and-tickle
February 28th, 2007 at 7:29 am
Bird, funny about docking yourself points daily . I think I’m going to start a point system for myself and others I know.
I think Nadia’s there as the token Muslim just in case CTU needs a translator. Eye candy? Maybe at first, but I’m getting tired of seeing her. She’s gotta play a bigger role eventually, she’s been kinda lame.
February 28th, 2007 at 10:05 am
I still don’t buy the whole “Tom was leading him on from the get-go” thing. I think he’s just covering his ass.
February 28th, 2007 at 10:21 am
Bill warns Jack about the sensitive nature of entering a consulate, and doesn’t lose atleast 20 for it?
C’mon! If there’s one person that understands the risks associated with consulate visits it’s Jack F’n Bauer.
February 28th, 2007 at 2:34 pm
Be sure to check out Logan’s entry. I do listen to you guys I really do
Aaron.
February 28th, 2007 at 4:31 pm
OK, so I’m kind of new to the 24 web scene so I don’t know if this has been mentioned yet, but I’ve been watching that last few seasons and someone says “perimeter” and “schematics” in 99% of the episodes. I think it’s +5 to whoever says each word in future episodes….it’s a great running gig.
Thanks for doing the countdown, it’s great fun!
April 5th, 2007 at 7:10 pm
I want to know if Charles is alive!! He saved Jack’s life by convincing the Suvaravs to allow us to storm their embassy and kill their peeps! Plus, his beard rocks! And he can’t die from a kitchen knife to the chest. He can’t even say that his wife stabbed him in the back, because she had the nerve to stab him in the front, from the back!
April 11th, 2007 at 11:50 am
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